Being in a relationship is hard work (duh, right?). When I was younger, I had this idealistic version of a spouse in my head. Now don’t get me wrong, I love Hubband with all my heart, but he has this itty bitty tiny flaw: he isn’t perfect. He annoys the shit out of me sometimes and I feel like shanking him in the eyeballs (I know for a fact at times he feels the same). I seriously want to scream “what country were you raised in that had free electricity and no one taught you to turn out a light when you leave a room? Ever. Not even fucking once. And why is it that he cannot ever put anything back where he found it? Examples include: Desitin, my sour candy, the tape measure, the tape, important pieces of paper we need for like, oh I don’t know, life, and everything he has ever touched. I know I can be a micromanaging bitchy-toned control freak, I know this, but at least I don’t turn the house into a free-for-all where no one can find anything where they need it.
The trouble with a life partner, spouse, girlfriend, boyfriend (or whatever you choose to call your significant other) is that you share life with them and, oftentimes, actual physical space. This is also the reason a lot of roommates eventually hate each other with a fiery passion over stupid shit like who bought the cereal, or who never cleans the bathroom. No relationship is without arguments, and people who don’t admit that are beyond lying and basically breaking some law of the universe. The key to any relationship is work. Like a lot of frickin’ work. And on a regular basis. The second (and equally important) key point is to look at what you did wrong. Anyone can find the flaws in someone else, it isn’t a gift to be able to elucidate everything that is wrong with someone. It makes you a bitch (I’m speaking primarily to the men here) but it is definitely not a positive attribute.
So, when I truly start to feel like I could scream the walls around me down, and tear my Hubband into tiny, miniscule shreds, I walk away. I walk away because nothing good or sweet is coming out of my mouth for the next twenty minutes. And let’s be honest, I have a pretty amazing husband overall for many, many reasons. First and foremost? He puts up with me! 😊